i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
