Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
You're earring is so big in my mouth
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize