My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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