is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize