also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
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