I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
COCAINE IS GR8
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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