hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
