I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
handjob tips. give me some.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
