No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
