We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
