So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize