I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
