yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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