do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
