how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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