Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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