i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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