We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
