her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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