Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
FUCK WHALES
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
