Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
