Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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