this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
