I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize