Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Randomize
