Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
