I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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