and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
