How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
