well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
They are going to name an STD after you.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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