Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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