How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
