i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
