Is it normal to miss your booty call?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
