he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
