is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
