I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
