Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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