I wish I could teleport
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
