that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
