Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
