This is not my ceiling
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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