All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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