the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
