google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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