all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
