Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
