whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
