Need sex. Gaining weight.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Randomize
