Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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